That's Preposterous
by Freelancer
Summary: Rita Skeeter has learned something about Albus Dumbledore and Minerva McGonagall, and now the whole wizarding world is going to know, too!


DISCLAIMER: Nothing's mine. All J.K. Rowling. Please don't sue.  
  
AUTHOR'S NOTE: Just some randomness that I pulled up from my archives and decided to post because there's not enough cute fluffy short stories in the world. ^_^ I rather like the little twist at the end, but that's me.  
  
SUMMARY: ... Do we really need a summary? This thing is like, five hundred words long. ^_^  
  
~~~  
  
HOGWARTS SECRET EXPOSED!  
By Rita Skeeter; staff writer, Daily Prophet  
  
One of the best kept secrets at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry has finally been revealed. Last week, a marriage license dated October seventh, 1958, was found in the Hogwarts archives. The names on the license were current Hogwarts headmaster Albus Dumbledore and deputy headmistress Minerva McGonagall. Three days ago, on October seventh, 1993, Dumbledore and McGonagall were seen having dinner together in Hogsmeade, followed by a long walk along the river. It has been confirmed that the two were celebrating their thirty-fifth anniversary.  
  
"I must admit that I am surprised by these findings," said Cornelius Fudge, current Minister of Magic. "I never would have suspected a relationship between Professor Dumbledore and Professor McGonagall."  
  
The Minister of Magic wasn't the only one that was surprised. "I had no idea," said former Hogwarts student Bill Weasley. "I knew they were friends, but all the teachers at Hogwarts are friends." Weasley, the Head Boy at Hogwarts in his seventh year, was a member of Gryffindor house, which has been headed by McGonagall since 1983. Even with all this proximity to the headmaster and deputy headmistress, Weasley never even imagined that Dumbledore and McGonagall were more than friends.  
  
Other students, however, were not as dense as Weasley. "I think it's adorable," said fifth-year Hogwarts student Alicia Spinnet, a member of Gryffindor house, in response to the news. "They're perfect for each other." Several other Hogwarts students in the vicinity agreed with Spinnet. The feelings among the students - with the exception of those in Slytherin house - are more or less uniform; the majority believing that a relationship between these two is not only within the realm of possibility, but even likely.  
  
Third-year Gryffindor Neville Longbottom was too busy looking for something he had lost to offer an opinion.  
  
The Hogwarts staff is attempting to keep their stance neutral. "I think I speak for the entire staff when I say this news, although unexpected, is not completely mind-blowing," said Defense Against the Dark Arts instructor Remus Lupin. "Albus and Minerva have always held each other in the highest esteem. Deep down inside, we always had a feeling that they were more than friends." Lupin then mumbled something about full moons and left.  
  
Divination instructor Sibyll Trelawney was asked why she thought Dumbledore and McGonagall kept this secret for so long. Trelawney responded by saying that she would have to consult her tea leaves before giving an answer. She was not seen again for the rest of the day. Potions Master and head of Slytherin house Severus Snape was also questioned. Snape declined to comment and then said something about needing to check on a potion brewing in his office. When asked if Dumbledore and McGonagall were as big of workaholics as Trelawney and Snape, Charms instructor and head of Ravenclaw house Filius Flitwick replied in the affirmative. "One can't help but wonder how they find the time for a personal relationship with all the work they do," Flitwick commented. With this statement in mind, it only makes sense that Dumbledore and McGonagall do as much work hiding their relationship as they do in the classroom.  
  
Pansy Parkinson, a member of Slytherin house in her third year, replied, "This is ridiculous," when asked what she thought about the news. "I think they should both be sacked." Nearby Slytherin students voiced their agreement, and the whole crowd began chanting, "Sack them, sack them, sack them!"  
  
Parkinson's wishes will probably not be realized. At the moment, Fudge has no plans for what will be done with them. Jack Liebniz, a spokesperson for the Ministry of Magic, said it is most likely that nothing will be done, as Dumbledore and McGonagall have managed to keep their personal lives completely separate from their professional lives. Another spokesperson, Lucius Malfoy, had a different opinion. "I think it's a conspiracy," Malfoy said. "They're hiding something."  
  
ARE they hiding something? One thing's for sure - people who keep secrets of this caliber from those closest to them certainly cannot be trusted.  
  
~~~  
  
Albus Dumbledore turned his eyes away from his copy of the Daily Prophet down and looked at the woman lying in bed next to him. "That's preposterous."  
  
Minerva McGonagall lifted her head off her husband's chest, glanced at the newspaper, and noddded. "That IS preposterous," she agreed. "Someone needs to tell these people that it was October sixth." 


End file.
